RIVER OF TEETH by Sarah Gailey

If you catch my thoughts here on this blog you might realize that I almost never give an F grade. I try to always find the good in something and if I manage to at least finish the book, the author accomplished something. But I got halfway through this novella and couldn't finish anymore. I got tired of rolling my eyes. There is no book this year that has a cooler sounding concept than this one: a bayou western set during an alternate history where the gulf is filled with feral, man-eating hippos. I mean, come on, how could I resist? But alas, big disappointment.

The book might appeal to some (or many), but the cutesy, trite approach was not up my alley. For a novella, it felt like it was taking forever to get to the point, spending most of time introducing the characters and trying in vain to make them memorable. I would've loved this if I actually cared about the people, if the interactions weren't terribly awkward and if the attempt to make them memorable didn't turn into useless character quirks. It was kinda like an action/adventure Royal Tenenbaums with hippos. And to some people, that would sound awesome. But not to me.

None of it felt sincere at all; I could see right through Gailey's attempts at vivacity and quirk, and the western conventions felt like cartoons rather than something genuine. Like someone who watched a couple of wild west movies rather than showing a real love for the genre. And the non-binary gender neutral pronoun thing kept taking me out of the story, trying to gather when Gailey was referencing the group or just the character Hero themself. But to top it all off, I just wanted to get to some damn hippo action already! Is that too much to ask?

Bummer.

GRADE: F

THE DARK TOWER VOL. 1: THE GUNSLINGER BORN

Here we go. Years ago, I had a great time going on the epic adventure of Roland and his ka-tet as they travel in search of the Dark Tower in order to save the world(s) in Stephen King's massive genre-bending epic. With the Dark Tower movie being released this year, I thought I'd delve into the huge multi-series comic book adaptation of the story, and it starts here.

In this first 5-volume series, with guidance from King, Peter David and Robin Furth decided to begin the story by compiling material from the prequel/flashback events referenced in the main series to detail Roland's early days as a gunslinger, the fall of Gilead and the moment when the world begins to break apart at the seams. This first volume, The Gunslinger Born, is essentially a retelling of the flashbacks in King's fourth DT novel, Wizard and Glass, where Roland and his buddies find love and violence while on their first mission to Mejis to investigate the movements of insane rebel John Farson, and take the first steps toward their ka.

Wizard and Glass was a controversial departure from the main story, but if you were like me and really enjoyed that tale of young Roland then you'll also enjoy this picture adaptation! Although at times I wish it was a bit more detailed in the settings, the inky artwork by Jae Lee and Richard Isanove is eye-catching, with memorable, iconic imagery. I also like the idea of the folksy narration being told in Mid-World dialect, but it did get a little obnoxious and distracting. Still, I'm pumped to jump back into the world of The Dark Tower and join Roland on his quest again.

GRADE: B

HOMBRE by Elmore Leonard

It's always a tricky thing reviewing an Elmore Leonard novel. His writing is usually so efficient and effortless that it doesn't seem like he's doing much but his stories sneak up on you anyway. I always struggle to go into detail about why I like the books, other than to say that I really enjoyed the story. He was able to buff and polish his style until the form became invisible and only story shined through. Donald Westlake was the same way in his work. Although there haven't been any Leonard books so far that have blown me away, I can definitely say I've enjoyed the five that I've read. Hombre, considered one of Leonard's classics, is no different. It's a simple plot, about a group of travelers in a mud wagon stagecoach who are stalked by road agents after a satchel of stolen money. Leonard's spare style and his use of first-person (his only novel to use that POV), is effective at lending the story it's mythic tone. It's deceptively uncomplicated and well-paced, right up to it's great final act.

GRADE: B+

A WIND OF KNIVES by Ed Kurtz

He wished for his guns, but decided his hate would have to do.

While the country is neck-deep in civil war, unassuming Texas rancher Daniel Hays wakes up to find his loyal ranch-hand and lover Steven castrated and lynched, hanging from a juniper tree. Daniel gathers his guns and his horse Oscar and sets out to reap vengeance on those responsible.

Based on that summary, you might expect this novella to be a Death Wish-style Western actioner where Daniel tracks each man down one by one and we get episodes of violent, cathartic retribution in graphic detail. But I was pleasantly surprised that this was much more brooding and contemplative, and more about studying the nature of revenge, and how much of an ineffective effort it can be. It shows how muddled it can be, how it rarely goes the way many would expect, but shows how through it all, Daniel keeps going out of a sense of duty; it's something he simply has to do. Another thing that I really enjoyed was the little hint of what might be some magical realism, which really added great texture to this tale. I'm lowering the score a bit though because the ending felt like a bit of a rushed cop-out and a let-down.

"I hope you get your revenge. A man can't be right when there's somebody livin' that oughtn't be."

GRADE: B

FALLEN LAND by Taylor Brown

Fallen Land is an expansion of Taylor Brown's title story from his award-winning collection In The Season of Blood and Gold, which I read last year and loved. This debut novel follows teenagers Callum and Ava, thrown together after he saves her during a pillaging in the middle of the Civil War. Together with their horse Reiver, they search for a place to call home, while trying to evade Callum's former gang and an infamous one-armed bounty hunter.

While I was equally impressed with Brown's writing here as I was when reading his short stories last year, this novel was a disappointment and a bit of a slog to get through. Most of the novel focuses on Callum and Ava riding through the countryside, which would have been alright if I were engaged with the characters. But ultimately they never really flew off the page for me. I'll be reading more by Brown because there's tons of promise and I like his short stories, but I really had high hopes for this one and it just turned out to be "okay."

*I received an advance copy of this through Netgalley in exchange for my honest take on it.*

GRADE: C+

PARADISE SKY by Joe R. Lansdale

"Now, in the living of my life, I've killed deadly men and dangerous animals and made love to four Chinese women, all of them on the same night and in the same wagon bed, and one of them with a wooden leg, which made things a mite difficult from time to time. I even ate some of a dead fellow once when I was crossing the plains, though I want to rush right in here and make it clear I didn't know him all that well, and we damn sure wasn't kinfolks, and it all come about by a misunderstanding."

And so begins the true account of the adventures of the Western legend Deadwood Dick, as told by his own damn self. He's eager to set the record straight about his story, which begins when as a young man named Willie Jackson, he runs away from home to escape a lynching after a grudge-crazed rancher catches him staring at his wife's ass. After he discovers that he's a natural horseman and shootist, Willie takes the name of Nat Love and embarks on a series of wild escapades across the frontier, making friends, killing enemies, finding love, rubbing noses with legends, and becoming one himself.

Once again Joe Lansdale crafts a Western adventure that is charming, exciting, and a pleasure to read, featuring a great lead character. And big ups to him for helping to bring attention to black western figures like Nat Love, since they've largely been ignored in movies and books. And aside from Love, the supporting characters and villains are a big reason why this one is so enjoyable, each one memorable and providing their own color to the overall tapestry. It's a testament to Lansdale's talent that with so many characters populating the book, he can make each one stand out. His considerable skill as a natural storyteller is again on full display here, with his folksy narrative voice and trademark wit proving a perfect fit for the story.

"Let's go outside and see how much of you is fact and how much of you is fart mouth and horseshit."

If you're looking for an entertaining, rousing adventure tale, throw this one on your to-read pile. I might even go as far as saying that it's even more knock-down awesome as his previous western The Thicket, but I personally wish he explored Nat as a more flawed character. It's a wonderful novel that I would gladly read again and a great folktale of the Old West. For companion reading, there is an old autobiography of the real Nat Love that was an inspiration for the novel, and Lansdale also published a novella with further adventures of Deadwood Dick called Black Hat Jack.

GRADE: A-

IN THE SEASON OF BLOOD AND GOLD: STORIES by Taylor Brown

It's always a great feeling when you feel like you've discovered a new author that's on the cusp of blowing up. When you feel that great privilege of knowing that not only is there still a whole career's worth of material to look forward to, but also once he/she gets hugely successful, you can say, "I was a fan from the beginning." In The Season of Blood and Gold (released last year in 2014) is Taylor Brown's debut, a collection of hard-hitting short stories, some of which have already won awards. 

"In a world gone white, ghosts must be the color of shadow."

I'm here to tell you that Brown is the real deal. His writing is some of the very best that I've read all year. He has a real mastery of language, using it in expressive ways, evoking both atmosphere, character, and emotion with impressive economy. There are some stories that seem like they could have been written by a young Cormac McCarthy, where Brown uses words like a mallet and chisel, making sure they stick with you long after reading. Here's the opening line of the award-winning story "Kingdom Come":

"The boy dropped the knife into the stone mouth of the well and watched the blade glitter into the depths, blood from its edge red-clouding its wake, haunting the blade like tidings of its history."

The stories take place in a wide variety of places and times, ranging from the Old West past to even a post-apocalyptic future. A big similarity that I noticed in the stories were the characters, all of which seem to be adrift in their respective worlds, searching for connections, their identities defined by what they do, whether it be a poacher, a soldier, a piano player, a moonshiner, a tattoo artist, or even an alligator wrestler.

My favorite story in the collection, "Whorehouse Piano," blew me away with it's efficiency in the way it illustrates the fascinating character of Lucy and how hard it hits emotionally in just five pages. It's about a former whore who now plays piano in her brothel, her complex and bittersweet relationship with the owner, and her journey to see her estranged father.

"They drove all night into bayou darkness, low-hung moss and the scarce reflection of blackwater amid the mangroves. Highway signs reared before them, bleary and wayward-tilted. Red-flattened carcasses of small mammals littered the road. Whoreson crossed himself when he saw them, reborn. Her hand retreated when he tried to hold it. They never touched, not since the night he slit her throat."

Other standout stories include "Sin-Eaters," set in an apocalyptic future, where one young man decides to buck the system once he finds beauty in a terrible world, "Bone Valley," about a lonely guy who wrestles gators for a living, as well as the beautiful title story, about a young Civil War soldier who risks everything after he meets the love of his life. This story also seems like it might be the basis for Brown's upcoming debut novel, Fallen Land, which I will be scooping up like a hotcake as soon as I can. So excited to read more from this guy! 

GRADE: A-

BLOOD MERIDIAN, OR THE EVENING REDNESS IN THE WEST by Cormac McCarthy

I recall that there's a book written by some lady who claims to have been chosen by Jesus to be taken on a tour of Hell for 40 nights and spread the word as a warning. That book was most likely just written by a crazy lady and I've never read it, but Cormac McCarthy wrote a book that's close to what I would imagine that experience being like. 

“It makes no difference what men think of war, said the judge. War endures. As well ask men what they think of stone. War was always here. Before man was, war waited for him. The ultimate trade awaiting its ultimate practitioner. That is the way it was and will be. That way and not some other way.”

Blood Meridian is like a walk (or ride) through all of your nightmares for 350 pages. I can confidently claim that there's probably nothing quite like it out there. But I admired the book more than I can say I enjoyed it. I admired McCarthy's obvious and famed skill as a wordsmith and his ability to paint a picture, but what left me cold wasn't the violence or darkness (there's such a distance in the writing that the violence isn't as affecting to me as was rumored), it was the fact that there wasn't really much happening and the story could've been told in 150 less pages than it was. For a large bulk of the book, our protagonist is essentially forgotten about. This really took away my emotional involvement and much of the book seems purposeful in being emotionally withdrawn. But once the book regains its focus on the kid, it starts to get pretty good in it's last quarter. But prior to that, we're basically tagging along with the Glanton gang as they talk shit and take scalps. And if there was a drinking game for every time McCarthy writes some variation of "And they rode on...", you wouldn't make it past page 100 before passing out.

Actually if McCarthy wrote this novel today it would be like 200 pages long and probably one of my favorite novels. He's definitely gotten more efficient as a writer. I think both of his latest novels, No Country For Old Men and especially The Road (which I consider a true masterpiece), take everything that he was doing in Blood Meridian, honed it down and pulled it off more successfully. His writing is tighter, more emotionally accessible, and at its most sublime in The Road, and the plotting is better in No Country, not to mention a more successful look at the nature of violence and the nihilistic view of fate. 

On another note, if you are having difficulty reading this or have read it and want another way of experiencing this, check out the unabridged audiobook read by Richard Poe. I listened to it and read it simultaneously and man it was one of the best audio performances I've listened to. Poe's voice seems like it was tailor-made to read books by Cormac McCarthy! 

“Only that man who has offered up himself entire to the blood of war, who has been to the floor of the pit and seen the horror in the round and learned at last that it speaks to his inmost heart, only that man can dance.”

But although I respect and appreciate the book for some great moments, for being like nothing else I've ever read, and for sporting some stunning prose, I was disappointed after hearing what a perfect masterpiece it was. Everything that people claim to love about this book, I feel that Cormac has done it better since. I've heard his Border Trilogy is pretty great, and I'll give that a try soon! or I'll jump into The Passenger next year!

GRADE: B-

THE REVENANT by Michael Punke

While reading this exciting western adventure, I was constantly reminded of how many things we take for granted today. Little things like blankets, lighters, automatic rifles, and those two words that kept

running through my mind while reading: ANTI. BIOTICS.

The book is based on the famous true story of Hugh Glass, the frontiersman working as a trapper for the Rocky Mountain Fur Company in 1823 gathering beaver pelts along the Missouri River. Things go south fast when he gets ripped apart by a grizzly bear while hunting. It's almost a sure thing that Glass will croak, so he doesn't take it personally when his colleagues abandon him, but when they steal his beloved knife and rifle, AND his flint and steel? Now that's totally unforgivable! Against all odds, Glass crawls across hundreds of miles of treacherous countryside to bring retribution to those that wronged him. 

I'd never heard of the story of Hugh Glass and I'm totally in awe of how much of a badass he was. The story is sometimes hard to believe; I mean damn the dude's throat was nearly severed and he couldn't walk! And with Michael Punke's well-conceived embellishments and dramatics, it really elevates to an even more extraordinary story. It's not only a gripping tale of classic revenge, but also of survival literally against all odds and about the extent that one man's determination can go. It's well-researched and its great sense of place was very transportive. And Punke uses an omniscient POV that's great for historical fiction that really gives the reader more info about the world and more historical scope beyond the immediate story. I was not only entertained but I also learned a lot and I was inspired to jump on the Interwebs and learn even more. And that's what historical fiction is all about, right?

"The frustrating necessity of delay was like water on the hot iron of his determination—hardening it, making it unmalleable. He vowed to survive, if for no other reason than to visit vengeance on the men who betrayed him."

GRADE: B+

THE SHOOTIST by Glendon Swarthout

GRADE: A

John Bernard Books has found out he has terminal prostate cancer.

Books is an aging but notorious gunman, who is known across the frontier for being dangerously quick on the draw, for loving women, and for killing over thirty men. So it comes to his dismay that he is destined to die an undignified and unremarkable death, taken down by a disease in his crotch. He doesn't have long to live and pretty soon news of his condition spreads around town. But J.B. Books is determined to die with some semblance of dignity.

And then, emptied, on hands and knees, head hanging over his own spew, teeth chattering with cold, in that animal posture he knew fear for the first time in his adult life.

 I was really taken with this outstanding novel and this great character: a portrait of a dying man who must figure out the best way to make his last stand in life. Author Glendon Swarthout creates a three-dimensional character out of the conventionally one-dimensional Western antihero. On the outside Books is trying to portray the same stoicism and grit that he's known for, but on the inside is a man terrified of dying the way he is. Not only is he forced to look back on his life and decide if it was truly worth anything, but he also has to deal with the town's sudden interest in his imminent death, interest both curious and nefarious, but everyone looking to profit one way or another.

A great theme that is prevalent throughout the book is the changing times. It is the turn of the 20th century, year 1901, and the West is changing from the frontier that it was to a more modern, civilized place. And the aging gunman is part of those dying times. He's constantly reminded of this in every new invention he sees, or by the newspaper articles he reads to pass the time.

She looked at him bravely now for the first time, at his face, the face from which a child had fled, and drew breath. She rose. Her eyes filled.

She knew.

He took her in his arms and kissed her ardently. Men in their hosts, young and old, innocent and corrupt, had paid her for her favors, but she put her arms about him of her own free will as though to give him what she could in recompense for this, the last gift she guessed, of his manhood.

It was a real joy reading this book, which was tender and mournful, like a melancholy fable, downright funny at times, and gorgeously written. Swarthout seems to always use just the right words; I felt like every page had a line or paragraph I wanted to make note of. The book also contains a stunning classic Western bar shootout that is well-crafted, dark, and nihilistic.

I would agree with critics that this is one of the best Western novels ever written (definitely one of the best that I've read). It's about courage, dignity and throwing up a middle finger to death, taking control of your life and the the way you leave it.

He thought: I will not break. I won't tell anybody what a tight I am in. I will keep my pride. And my guns loaded to the last.

THE THICKET by Joe R. Lansdale

GRADE: A-

This was an entertaining, escapist story about a teenage Jack Parker who gathers a motley crew of unlikely heroes to help track down a gang of rough outlaws and save his kidnapped little sister. This is the first book I've read by the prolific Joe R. Lansdale, and in the vein of the classic True Grit, it's both a very enjoyable Western adventure and a great coming of age story. Are most of Lansdale's work like this? If so, I've got some more reading to do!

There are many other stories similar to the one you'll read in The Thicket. But Lansdale's easy writing really elevates it. He fills his story with an irresistible cast of well-drawn characters. I love how Jack doesn't a gather a bunch of hard, badass, Rooster Cogburn-types, but recruits a posse that many look at as being outcasts and a group that seem like they would fail from the outset. But as the story continues, you see that the group's heart and determination is what makes them extraordinary, and you can't help but root for them. And it's Jack himself that really gives the story it's heart and holds it together. It's a true coming of age tale, where we see that in this journey into the heart of darkness, he struggles with his values and beliefs as he realizes that he has to get down and dirty to save his little sis, even at the expense of his soul. 

To some extent I find sin like coffee. When I was young and had my first taste of it I found it bitter and nasty, but later on I learned to like it by putting a little milk in it, and then I learned to like it black. Sin is like that. You sweeten it a little with lies, and then you get so you can take it straight.

Great book. Read it when you can, you won't be disappointed.

VALDEZ IS COMING by Elmore Leonard

 

GRADE: B+

Quiet, part-time town constable Roberto Valdez is called in when a mob has tracked down a black man who is accused by Tanner, a rich businessman in town, of being an Army deserter and murderer. Roberto tries to diffuse the situation and is forced to shoot the man, who was holed up in a house with his pregnant girlfriend and turned out to be totally innocent. When Valdez goes to Tanner to ask for reparations for the man's wife, Tanner's crew beats Roberto and tries to crucify him, leaving him for dead. They should have made sure they finished the job. Because everyone in town underestimated him. And only a few remember that Bob Valdez used to be a real badass back in the day, and when he comes for you, he comes strong. He's already tried to talk to them as civilized men but they wouldn't listen. But this time, maybe they'll listen to bullets.

This early Elmore Leonard western showcases the same lean and witty prose that eventually made his later crime novels so popular. Sparse and direct writing work so well with Western fiction, and Leonard was one of the best writers in the genre. There are not many wasted pages in the book and I love the classic tale of a man who has shelved his violent past, but must bring it back in order to right a major wrong. A fast and enjoyable read.

LONESOME DOVE by Larry McMurtry

GRADE: A

 “Yesterday's gone on down the river and you can't get it back.”

I’ve been a big fan of Western movies for a while, but I’ve only recently started reading Western fiction. This Pulitzer prize-winning epic adventure is considered by many to be one of, if not the best novel in the genre.  Now that I’ve finished it, it would be hard to argue with that.

The book follows aging best friends Woodrow Call and Augustus “Gus” McCrae, who were once famous Texas Rangers that fought Indians on the frontier, but for the last 15 years, have retired and now operate a small livery in the sleepy Texas border town of Lonesome Dove. They’ve been living a simple life with their buddies and the other residents of the town, including the sad and emotionally distant Lorena, Lonesome Dove’s only whore. But when the duo’s friend, the gambling ladies’ man Jake Spoon, returns after many years, describing the beautiful, untouched grassland in the largely unsettled Montana territory, Call is inspired to go on one last adventure and, with Gus, be the first to settle in Montana and become successful cattlemen in their old age. Gus is initially not interested in the idea, content with them spending their old age hangin’ out in the sun along the Rio Grande, instead of risking their lives on the open range. But he agrees because of the prospect of reconnecting with his lost love Clara, who he knows has settled in Nebraska, which would be on the way. So after stealing 3,000 heads of cattle from a Mexican bandit and hiring a ragtag team of cowboys, they set off on an epic cattle drive across the country from Texas to Montana. On the way, they will make new friends, lose old ones, encounter great dangers and witness great beauty.

I’m always nervous when I begin reading long novels, hoping that I’m not wasting my time. It was no different when starting Lonesome Dove. At first, it felt like it was taking way too long for them to even get started on the cattle drive. Instead the first part of the book seems like it's mostly focused on the characters sitting around Lonesome Dove. But this novel is a sneaky little bugger. There came a moment (not even sure when it happened) when I realized that while it seemed like nothing was happening, the book was slowly sucking me in until I was completely engulfed in the tale. The characters are so detailed, so real, that I couldn't help but to be completely invested in their lives and what would happen next. And not just the main characters, but the minor roles (even the animals like the Hell Bitch, the two blue pigs, and the mean bull) were incredibly well-drawn. The length of the novel was imperative to this kind of character development. And not only did the length help with getting to know the characters, but it also made me feel like I was part of the cattle drive, living through not only the dangers, but through the slow tedium of it all. And because the trip is tedious, the joy I felt when the cowboys finally make it to certain landmarks in the trip was really something!

The tone and atmosphere is another thing that sucked me in. The story has a truly romantic mood, like a great adventure story should have, reading like a long love letter to the dying Old West. The theme of "longing" runs all throughout the novel, from Call wanting to develop a thriving, meaningful business before it's too late, to Lorena wanting a place to call home and someone to connect with, to Dish Bogget, who's undying love for Lorena is so large it's tragic, to Gus, stuck between his love for two women and his love for adventure, and to young Newt (the heart of the story), who not only wants to see more of the world outside of Lonesome Dove and be accepted as a man and cowboy, but longs for a father figure. 

Lonesome Dove is truly something special. It has something for everyone and is possibly the essential western story, a tale that encompasses everything that the genre stands for.

" 'It ain't dying I'm talking about, it's living,' Augustus said. 'I doubt it matters where you die, but it matters where you live.' "

Favorite Novels by Stephen King

My Top 10 Favorite Novels by Stephen King

*excludes novellas, short stories, and collections*

1. The Stand

2. The Green Mile

3. The Long Walk

4. The Dead Zone

5. 11/22/63

6. Pet Sematary

7. Under The Dome

8. 'Salem's Lot

9. Misery

10. The Dark Tower Saga

THE SON by Philipp Meyer

GRADE: C-

I tried to like this novel. The premise sounds like something I'd love. A multi-generational story told in parallel narratives, exploring the creation of myths and legends, and how the experiences of one man can affect future generations. The central story, of a young teenage boy who is kidnapped by Comanche marauders after seeing his mother and sister raped and scalped, and growing up amongst the Comanche, is fairly engaging and informative historically. The main problem is that the other two narratives are not compelling in the least. The story of Jeanne Ann McCullough for instance is terribly repetitive as she lays injured and alone in her house, reflecting on her past, which feels like the same thoughts and events over and over. The other character, Peter McCullough, is incredibly wooden and flat. I made it through about 250 pages, about half of the novel, until I called it quits. :(

TRUE GRIT by Charles Portis

GRADE: B+

This is a great story with a wonderful, courageous, young female protagonist, which you don't see too often in Westerns. After her father is shot down by a low-down coward while on a trip to Fort Smith, 14-year old Mattie Ross courageously sets out on an adventure deep into Indian territory to avenge him, with the help of a one-eyed, washed-up marshal and a fancy Texas Ranger. The story is very exciting and sometimes very funny. I thought the climax left a little to be desired and there were a few missed opportunities, but otherwise I really enjoyed this popular Western classic.

“People do not give it credence that a fourteen-year-old girl could leave home and go off in the wintertime to avenge her father's blood but it did not seem so strange then, although I will say it did not happen every day. I was just fourteen years of age when a coward going by the name Tom Chaney shot my father down in Fort Smith, Arkansas, and robbed him of his life and his horse and $150 in cash money plus two California gold pieces that he carried in his trouser band.”